Judging from the contents of our fridge, Chris has been living on kosher Coke, sake, and turkey sandwiches while I was away. Luckily I was able to scrounge up the ingredients for my old boyfriend peanut butter toast, which I ate in bed while watching Heroes and waiting for my luggage.
I don't understand how people raise babies. Two nights in a row of less than five hours sleep have incapacitated me. If I ever had a baby, I would do nothing but lie in bed, watch TV, and eat food that I could make in the toaster oven.
Or I would lie in bed and watch TV until it was time to go to my stepmother's for dinner. Maybe she could raise the baby, too.